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Losing Should

I have been taking a lot of walks these days which gives me a lot of time to think. Sometimes I really haul it and can cover more than my 2.2 miles. Sometimes I need to take my time and it takes longer than my 45 minutes. I decided that I am ok with both. I want to talk about something that has been rolling around in my head for a while now. It pertains to us all… We are all guilty of it. I decided today that I want it to stop using the word “should” when I talk about the things I am able to do.

Daniel and I talk a lot about how things feel. How the set feels, how your body feels. There is a lot of feeling that goes with studying and practicing Tai Chi and Kung Fu. We don’t have mirrors on the walls because we want you to FEEL what is right… Then you will know it in your bones. So when we ask you how does this or that feel? We truly want to know how you are in that given moment. This moment, this time through, this class. In this moment we can take the opportunity to fine tune what is happening. Whether it’s your balance feeling off or your coordination feels disjointed… maybe your body doesn’t like how you are shifting your weight? There is plenty of things going on in any one move. I desire “real time” feed back so we can help you move forward. 

I hear and read many people in my life using the word “should” when talking about what they are doing or accomplishing. 

I just walked 2.2 miles but I “should” be able to do 3. 

I just finished this awesome book but I “should” have read it quicker.

I just nailed three high pats in a row but I “should” be able to get deeper into crossing leg stance.

I just finished section one all by myself but I “should” be in section two by now.

The list goes on and on with how we think things “should” be. I want us to be AWESOME now. We can always do better and get stronger, but right now WE ARE AWESOME. We need to lose the word “should”. 

The “should’s” have no place in AFC716… I am focused on where you are now and how I can help you move forward. What you are doing now and how you feel now is what is important to me. Talking about where you want to go from here is important to me. Together we can get through anything. Daniel and I don’t have an agenda or a time frame when it comes to the speed of your learning. Every day you walk in to class we are ready to teach you where you are. We’re happy to celebrate your successes even if it’s a little thing like you remembered to flip your hand out in Cloud Hands. It’s all a win. 

We all have goals. Where we want to go with our practice. I love goals as they keeps us moving forward and winning. Let’s promise each other that we will stop with the “should’s”. We deserve to be happy with how we are now and where we are going. 

Ok I will step off my soap box now… hopefully I don’t trip. 

~Kate

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